Ian is supposed to clean his room every Saturday before he takes off to "hang out" with friends. (He looked at me with quite a bit of disdain when last week I asked if he wanted to invite some friends over to "play" so now it's "hang out.") Ian's idea of a clean room and my idea of a clean room are polar opposites.
The room cleaning started when Jordan came home for the weekend and we loaded up his truck with furniture I couldn't sell at a garage sale even if it was marked "FREE!!" This furniture has been downstairs in the "boys" area, which means the area I never go down into unless I smell something. It's decorated with a Foosball table, antlers, hats on antlers, a table that wiggles, a dart board with darts that have weird things written on them in permanent marker, a sofa bed that doesn't work because Mike and Jordan dumped it out of the second story window rather than take it down the stairs and, my favorite, food in various states of decay.
Jordan is sharing an apartment down in Bailey with a young man he worked with on his fire crew last year so naturally their apartment needs furniture-they are two young men recently graduated from college. I told Jordan he could have Ian's twin bed since Ian never sleeps in it. Ian sleeps: on the sofa bed, on the floor, on two chairs pushed together, on one chair, on the wiggly table with pillows underneath and on the floor. Ian does not like beds. When he was small he would sleep in his closet in, what he called, his nest, which was a bunch of blankets and pillows mushed up. One time I found him in the bathtub with blankets and pillows mushed up. I'm not sure what Ian has against beds, but he wasn't too upset when we loaded up his twin bed for his older brother. Not that he is that giving with is older brother, just that now I can't yell "You have to sleep in your bed once a week."
Taking apart Ian's bed revealed numerous object that I had been looking for, which is where the idea of a "Mom Clean," versus a "14 Year Old Clean" comes into play. I found the fence pliers, the ones with the orange handles I had been looking for. I found three kitchen knives. I found something the color of magenta in a plastic bag which I was afraid to open. I found duct tape. I found stick pens, pens, pencils, erasers and his ruler which we searched for frantically last Friday in the middle of a Science experiment.I am convinced that Ian will grow up to be a hoarder and be featured on TLC's "Hoarders" television show.
Ian also creates things. I found something that was taped and stapled together. I found something that was wired together and included bolts that he had painted. I found a piece of orange braided hay rope. I found more duct tape. I found pennies hot glued together.
Jordan is very neat. Jordan would love to have a label maker. Ian would take the label maker apart. Jordan is very organized. He has colored coded notebooks for college. Ian has color coded notebooks that he has duct-taped shut. Jordan has boxes that are labeled. Ian has boxes that I'm afraid of. Jordan will be very successful in life. Ian will be a mad genius. Ian moved his dresser out into the garage and now his clothes are laying in his closet in a jumbled pile (more of the nest syndrome). Jordan took the dresser back with him.
It's funny how two boys, same DNA, same parents, same beliefs, same everything, can be so different. They will both do well in life; Jordan because he follows the rules and Ian because he does not.
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